Lighter take on the news

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Kate and William are pregnant (again)! The exclamation mark is not because they are expecting another baby, it's because I actually
said William was pregnant...call it pc or bc (bullcrap in case you are having a slow day). I won't be offended if you go with the latter, in fact, I'll be surprised if you don't.

Kate suffers from Hyperemesis Gravidarum, a condition during pregnancy that is far more difficult to tolerate than to pronounce. Unfortunately, and often misguidedly,  a lot of women claim to have suffered from the condition while pregnant.

Now it's not like me to rant (I know.... I wrote that with a straight face) but unless you have managed to only have tiny bites of a Nutrigrain bar through the day - and heaved a sigh of relief at managing to keep it down - and unless you have managed to have the tiniest of sips of water and keep it down even though it tastes as if a teaspoon of rust has been stirred in it - and unless you have lost a stone and a half in weight, I have news for you - you have not suffered from HG.

How do I know? Exactly 18 years and 9 months ago, I suffered from HG when I was pregnant with my second daughter. I had severe morning sickness with my first, nearly 21 years ago, something that a lot of women who claim to have had HG, experience. Trust me, been there, done that and wearing the tee shirt that says, 'I know the difference.'

Now, if you are intelligent - and you must be since you are reading my blog - you will have deduced that we have two 'big' birthdays in our household this year. It is like having Christmas twice over, both in celebration and expense!

Guess who has decided to lift his halo and give it a polish? JC. Not the original JC - his halo is untarnished and has been for 2000 years. I am talking of Britain's very own JC. Yes, Jeremy Corbyn has decided to practise veganism. Someone should introduce him to Gwynnie Paltrow. I can just see her turning into a Corbynista.

I would like to write some more but alas I can't. I love the word 'alas,' I wish it would make a comeback. No other word expresses regret better than 'alas'!

Anyway, back to my reason for the slightly shorter blog. I was gutting a trout the other day (I hope you are suitably impressed) and for some reason - could be that I was holding my breath and there was a lack of oxygen going to my brain -when my right hand mistook the Peter pointer finger of my left hand for the fish's guts and tried to slice off the top of it.

Don't panic Mum, it is okay but slightly cumbersome (another word that should make a comeback) to type, with good old Peter pointing to the ceiling. Just as well it was Peter pointer and not Toby tall!

Until next week, try and keep it light! Alas, I won't - not with two big birthdays this month.